Did The AIB Kockout Offend you?

You are at a swarming place and you get mistreated in the midst of thousands of people….you are driving and suddenly get overhauled by someone ;you miss an accident on a very narrow brink and you heave a sigh of relief… when you face corruption and crimes on a daily basis, you shake your head,  conciliate and compromise with your destiny. When there is a need to speak up, you decide to hush down, but when you have the choice to do or not do something that brings you displeasure…what do you do? You scream…you howl and you make noise.

Let me bring a simple illustration into your minds. Imagine yourself at a buffet meal, and you come across a plate of green chillies. You know very well, the consequences of having green chillies and yet you capitulate to it. So what happens? You burn your tongue, your ears and various parts of your soul. So what are you going to do about it? Kick the waiters? Sue the restaurant? Get the Chef arrested? You might not be fond of chillies but no one forced you to have them. The chillies were arranged with the other dishes as  there are people who love a little spice and zest in their lives. The bottom line here is to understand and choose what is best for you and forget the rest until it’s not forced onto you and your families.

Let me get to the point now. Why did the AIB Roast Rip your lives and souls so much that you wanted the LAW and ORDER to interfere?  Well, we all had a fair amount of idea what the whole Roast was going to be and sound like and yet, all of us watched it and after watching the whole roast without a pause we decide that it’s against the code and culture of India. In India, we have  dunderheads blaming women for rapes, practicing Honour Killing , causing communal violence and molesting women. If this is culture then I don’t see us developing as a nation- economically or in attitude and mindset.

Every day we come across cracked and irrational scenarios…we see child labour, child trafficking, domestic violence and yet we turn our heads in the opposite direction and walk off. AIB didn’t cause harm to a level that had to attract such an odium and revulsion.  It was meant for a different set of audience who appreciate humour in its rudimentary form.  It was not meant for you…so relax, meditate  a little and breathe. The Indian culture and the code of ethics  were all developed by humans. When we pray to god, we fold our hands… when we see violence we cover  our eyes…but when we need to speak about something that is seriously damaging our country, we cover our mouths….and yet, we have lots to speak about a culture that is detrimental to everyone. 

Please  go through this eye opening video of the ÄIB Roasts Parody’s Parody…. It clearly exemplifies what I am feeling now- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEgFEJG29ko

Image Credits: Google

Wishing all the Singlets- Happy Valentine's day!!!!

This post is specifically dedicated to all the single ladies…who feel dejected on Valentine's Day!

I know the level of crossness and irascibility one faces when she hears another lady’s monologue on her potential date with her beau….but let me tell you something, there is no need to be irritable because this is a chance for us “Singlelets” to enjoy and live the true essence of valentine’s  day.

We are phenomenal women who don’t necessarily need a man to make us happy because we can do various other things to make us happy anyway….. things  we have been dying to do….things that we love to do with a self-allowance to be crazy for a day. Being a part of a couple, a person might not have the liberty to do everything he/she likes because there are limitations one succumbs to keeping in mind the other partner’s likes and interests towards certain activities; so many a times couples end up sacrificing for each other and in the end, they might not even have a good time. It’s true, I have heard many stories about ruined valentine’s day which I will be very careful not to mention here.

So what could go wrong in a date with yourself? You could hit a club, a park, a beach, a spa, a library, a museum, a bar, an orphanage, a culinary center…the list is endless…. Or you could host an all single gal &guy party- an interesting chance to meet someone if you are interested.

It’s definitely great to have someone in your life to share your happiness, grief, eventful happenings etc…but what is more important than that is the realization that you are responsible for your own happiness. Let this day be about you, knowing you, loving you like never before, and pampering you like never before so that when you wake up the very next day, you wake up with a feeling of fulfillment towards life.

So make this day about you and your interests; because on all the other days you keep your identity aside and live a professional life on somebody else’s direction. So, when was last time you spent quality time with the real you. All the great movie scripts written till date by writers were when they were on a vacation to a lonely distant island away from friends and family and they have always managed to come up with master pieces. This is because the lonely times spent by the writers on their own gave them a chance to look at the story in a different outlook without an external perspective which reflected the purity of their thoughts and gave the story a beautiful shape. So when are you planning to craft a beautiful story of your own with your own pure thoughts? You can always take advises from others but never let their standpoints affect yours because this is your own path of life with a completely different story. This valentine’s  day is all yours, give yourself enough time to craft a beautiful  story about your life so that you are responsible for your own happiness.

Happy Valentine’s day!!!

66th Republic Day- A Refinement in every way.....

Wing Commander Pooja Thakur, the First Lady Officer
to command The Guard of Honour

The 66^th Republic Day  fashioned a day in Indian history that’s going to remind people of a Revolution where our country witnessed power, strength, might, valour, grace, justice, elegance and beauty all at the same time. My chest swells with pride when I say that the “Women Power” was showcased in every aspect throughout the Parade....The marching contingents...the unfurling of the Flag and yea  the dearest First Lady sitting quietly, yet gracefully and witnessing and absorbing every facet of the event. Our Republic Day Parades have always been about the exhibition of our military power, our might, our diverse culture and tradition throughout, we have always displayed our beauty and diversity with incessant and interminable allure; however the Recent Republic Day was one step ahead to refinement.

I am a Military Brat and my Dad had taken part in the 46^th Republic Day Parade (exactly 20 years back) where he led the Naval Contingent as a Naval Officer. So, Republic Day parades always hold a special position in my heart because I know that every soul who is out there displaying a certain aspect about my country is representing India, representing us and demonstrating what each one of us feel about our country. I had always wondered out loud- why can’t women participate in a Day like this? This Day belongs to them as much as it belongs to the men after all we had so many women involved in SHAPING THE CONSTITUTION OF INDIA!!- Sarojini Naidu, Renuka Ray, Purnima Banerjee, Begum Aiza Rasul and lots more...

Lieutenant Haobam Bella Devi unfurls the flag

Armed forces which was primarily a male-dominated area, today boasts proudly of having young and confident women who in many instances have even outdone their male counterparts. In 1992( under the Women Speial Entry Scheme) when certain doors in the Armed Forces were thrown  open for  women, they grabbed the opportunity and tried to establish themselves in the fields of Aviation, Engineering, Law and Logistics. Even then, they were not completely accepted in this new Domain. There was no equality or justice. The women just existed for  namesake. The women  don't enjoy permanent commission in the Armed Forces. Permanent Commission refers to a career in Armed Forces till one retires. currently the women serve as Short Service Commissioned officers where they can only serve for a period from 5-15 years. On retirement they are entitled to certain benefits as ex-servicemen but they are not eligible for pension. So in 2003, a group of women officers filed a petition in order to avail permanent commission. The issue is still under sub judice with the Supreme Court.

However, post the elegant display of the women power and valour in the 66^th Republic Day Parade, my respect and love towards our Armed Forces have grown exponentially. I can see we have taken the most effective step by letting the people know that the Marching Ground looks highly beautiful with the addition of the Beautiful Gender of our country marching across and the unfurling of the flag looks ever graceful when performed by a lady. This step will widen many horizons and will enable people to bring new perspective to their personal lives, work places and homes.

There will definitely come a day when a lady exclaims loudly about her desire to join the Armed forces, she would not be inviting any wrath of her parents, relatives, neighbours, society, locality, community or friends but she would receive a pat on her shoulder for her decision to be and do something for our country without being judgemental about her future. I am sure we will graduate into a country where a woman will be known for her contribution towards the country and not for all the supposed wrong decisions made by her...... I am sure a day will come when her success will be appreciated more than her round Chapattis....I am sure she will be respected more for her profession than for her ability in looking after the kids at home.... I can smell that time very closely...

I anticipate a bright future.........do you?

Image Credits: Google

Reference:

http://www.gatewayforindia.com/articles/army_women.htm

http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/permanent-commission-for-women-hanging-fire/article6824595.ece

Are you happy?

Just as Sunday begins to end to a new tomorrow...to a new week...I contemplate and decide- I just have to be wackier, crazier and barmier than I was last week. Oh that’s imperative because every week should have something new, different and crazy to look forward to.  No I am not trying to eat my words on my new year resolution post, where I said there is no need to make big plans in life and that your life should go with the flow. Well, I am not even talking about making any strategies at all. All I am saying is, just as you wake up in the morning all you need to tell yourself is- I am going to do something different today!! Trust me, it makes you feel different...and you learn something crucial about yourself.

A friend of mine always made it a point to smile at random strangers on her way to work. While all her friends and family advised her against this activity as it could dig her up into trouble, she never stopped. Once when I was walking with her we noticed an old bloke walking towards our direction with a pained look on his face. He was tired and tensed and then he looked at her. She smiled at him...he didn’t even know her but the smile she gave him was so warm and friendly that he just had to smile back. I was flabbergasted. After we crossed him I asked her- “Seriousy, what was the point...? You just baffled him!

“Atleast he will forget his worries while trying to place me in his mind”.- said my friend.

Oh she made sense..she completely made sense....and she, throughout this whacky yet beautiful activity of hers ,realized that what she loved to do is eradicate adversities and bring smiles onto people’s life. So what now? She is a social activist!!!  Well, she isn’t exactly making alot of money but she is happy and I believe that’s a very important aspect in all our lives- to be happy and remain happy!!!!

Many a times, we are so involved in our professional selves that we believe we are happy and content in our lives. So, why do most of us feel so let down and depressed  every Monday...why do we feel that the start of every week is actually the start of anguish and torment. Why is it so difficult to wake up on a Monday...why can’t we just breathe regularly on a Monday...and why do we stop pausing and looking around on a Monday ? C’mon all of us here know that there is no issue with Monday.....the issue is with you. You are not happy....so what makes you happy? You need to figure that out...and how do you figure that out? Well, you do that by exposing thyself to various opportunities that life brings to you or by creating opportunities on your own. You could love dreaming, cooking, dancing, singing, running, talking, walking, drinking, skating or doing any crazy thing in this world. Trust me, the crazier things you attempt, and the better.

Don’t stress, it can be anything.... like introducing yourself to a new dance form, reading a new book, trying a new hairstyle, writing a new diary page, cooking a new dish, designing a new creative. Please understand that when you are doing this you are not creating a different vertical. NO!!!  What you are doing is trying is, knowing yourself better....what you are....and what you want...and when you figure out what you are, the happiness and satisfaction you get out of it is unconditional.

Before trying to figure out life, try to figure out thyself because your life starts and ends with you...and the secret to your happiness also lies with you. A misery or an issue looks excruciating and unbearable because you are unable to deal with it; and in order to figure out a solution to that problem, you need to first figure out yourself and once you do that you will figure out everything.

Someone tried to tell me once, life would have been easy if it was a giant canvas and  if we are painters; so we could paint our own situations. Well, life is just that!!!!! It’s your canvas...paint a picture....everyday and every minute. Let your life be about you...I don’t care if you are  single/married/old/fat/a woman/a man/gay/divorced/a monkey. It’s your life and you better value it. Break the wall which is trying to canopy you within your limits. Well honestly, there are no limits...limits are invisible evil ghosts between you and “a” you which you have never really figured out.

I am not going to type anymore...I only want you to answer this question by yourself.... “ How well do you deal with regrets?”.

Image Credits: Google

A New Year Resolution? Humour me!!

Every year on the night of 31^st, just a couple of hours from New Year, we retrospect, reflect and declare- 2014 has been such a waste…I am going to make sure that 2015 is a better year without any mistakes of the incumbent year; life will be better as I will exercise regularly, eat healthy, party less; well, then what happens? How many of our plans and strategies have favoured us affirmatively till the end? Why don’t we allow life to be a pleasant surprise but an official strategic plan? Why does coffee intake have to be at 11 pm, lunch at 1 pm and evening tea at 4 pm every day? Why is every minute of life a meticulous corporate agenda?

In this instance, I remember an uncle of mine who never got tired of telling me his love story, and I never got tired listening to it. Now his story plays a perfect example of my perspective. He keeps telling me how he missed his regular tea break at 3.30 pm outside his work premises and had to once go at 4.45 for his tea. And that was when he saw his mate coming out of a tutorial room. He fell in love and chose the 4.45pm tea break session ever since.  He would keep telling me that if he had stuck to his regular 3.30 pm tea break session, he wouldn’t have ever met his love and even after 40 years of matrimony, life wouldn’t have been so beautiful .He says “ Life is beautiful when one fine day you leave your office early and take a different route home and walk by the beach you meet different people, see different activities, experience a different atmosphere….”

I have friend, who I won’t name but she is known to be a great planner of life. She spends hours and hours making presentations on her plans and resolutions for the year; and everyday depending on new developments in her life, she alters her plan. On questioning her about this insanity, she says “ I want every minute to be productive, I hate wasting time unnecessarily”. I asked her “ When was the last time you chilled out with your folks and talked about stuffs apart from work, walked on the footpath without apprehensions of a future activity, tasted and absorbed your favourite ice cream to your soul, laughed till your jaws ached, played with little kids, spoke to a distant favourite relative on phone, cooked your favourite meal to placate yourself ?” She had no answer; she was so busy giving a structure to her uncertain future that she forgot to smell the present.  

Resolutions might never fall in place, plans might not work so stop wasting time deciding a future and instead, work out a today. Mix your desires, dreams, wishes, wants, hobbies, cravings into the bowl of present and work out a delicious meal of “today”, everyday. Let every moment be about impulse, about you, about what you love. Don’t bother doing the same thing everyday, instead take a different route home and decide what works the best for you. Don’t listen to people because they have no idea what your life and journey is about. You are special, you are beautiful…. So paint a different picture everyday, cook a different meal everyday and learn a different language everyday.

People plan every step of their life in their early 20s or 30s to live a comfortable life at 50s; but what if you don’t reach your 50s, what if you die?  All that struggle and sacrifice for what? What you need my ladies, is to breathe irrespective of your age; I don’t care if you are 15, or 35 or 75…..you need to breathe and start living, not sacrificing. People who suffer from cancer and are on their deathbeds feel upset about a life they can never have. So let’s stop worrying about plans and strategies and start living. Let nothing stop you. Take your bags, put on your boots and walk a long way, walk till you are tired...walk till you meet your soul-mate….walk till you have discovered your favourite ice cream flavour….walk till you finally soak your hair with sweat…walk till you finally discover the difference between living a life and dealing with life. 

Image Credits: Google

My fluttering Butterfly….

 A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life. ~ Unknown

If you have a sibling, you are a lucky dude but if you have a sister then you are luckier, however if you have a little sister- life is a giant feast. A feast with a lot of desserts where unfortunately, we have got to face a little bitter dish here and there; as no cook in this world is perfect. When you eat your perfect dish sometimes u come across tangy stuff, pungent ingredients; you might put aside what you don’t like but you will never abandon your dish because it had an awesome start. That is exactly how it is when you have a little sister in your life. She is sweet, she is spicy she is bitter…but she is yours till the very end.

When I was 2 years of age, I received a gift in a form of a small rotund doll with a lot of hair on her head like a little brown crown....but hey, “she moves!!!” I thought. “She blinks her eyes just like me and she is so fair…her cheeks are as flushed as raspberries…is she mine?? Please tell me I can keep her forever.” said the 2 year old me to mom and dad. They smiled and told me she is mine and that I have to be a protective elder sister and take care of her always. How lovely of them, I thought then…. how smart of them, I think now.

True to my words, I have always been around her, took care of her, played with her and groomed her. She was actively involved in making my life pleasant, participated in all my crimes, and played a lawyer in my defence; but sometimes she was also a reason why I wished I was a single child; as she was very smart in using my tactics against me- the leader who taught her the act.

When we were young, she was as petite as snow and as delicate as a bubble. She wanted her elder sister around when the big boys bullied her, when dad and mom cornered her and when her friends irritated her. Me in akimbo was enough to scare any goon or anything evil from her, that is what she believes unequivocally even now.

As we grew older, life taught me that I need her more than she ever needed me in life. We are from the same set of parents, with the same blood running in our veins with the same upbringing and cultural values instilled. But like they say- no two snowflakes are alike. I learnt that both of us are completely different in absolute different ways and that she always stood by me to support me in all my misery. When I was in 5^th Grade, I was once weeping on the school stairs over an incident, where my friends teased me for my hairstyle. I got upset and ran to the staircase near the school library- Library because, that’s one place nobody visits. Anyway, my sister found out and she came running to me to share a piece of chocolate her friend gave her and saw me crying. She stormed into my classroom and yelled at my friend saying, “well atleast my sister does not have the most stupid pigtails you are sporting. You look like a monkey with those pigtails” and dashed out of the class. She came to me and she said, “If someone has to insult you, it can only be me. I wont allow anybody else to say anything to you”, and she went back to her class leaving me marveling at my 8 year old sister.

You can’t get her eat any chocolate or a piece of cake without her sharing it with me. That’s a must for her. Every chocolate, every piece of cake and every pizza or samosa has a share for me always; even now. On all her birthday parties, she would tell the closest relatives to also get a gift for me. In order to appease her, granddad still wishes us both on both our birthdays. Now even as grownups nothing has changed . All I know is, her love and consideration has only grown for me. She is my little sister but is far mature and intelligent than I am. I am the one who gets cranky and jealous when she is given more importance and then she takes charge and handles my immaturity with epic sweetness. She ensures I am given enough importance as she hates it when I make a big noise about it.

When you look at her, you will notice that she is pretty, she is classy and she is soft; and when you look at me you will see that I am an overgrown baby who is loud and abrupt. She hates is when I don’t maintain a decorum when I am at  public places. She will give me a disapproving look when I would fight with cabbies for fares or when I would yell at a shop keeper in high decibels. Like I mentioned before, personality wise, we are as different as sky and water but as sisters we are as compatible as milk and sugar.

She is my everything in life and has proved to be my coloured butterfly during depression, my angel for discretion and my doll throughout life. No problem remains a problem with her in the vicinity and no damage remains damage, with her chocolaty effect on them. Sharing problems with her gives me a great sense of relief and a feeling as if it’s already resolved. Her smile works as a remedy during misery and medicine during pain. Now she is in the US, pursuing her dream and yea the distance sure matter; but my sister knows exactly how to cover up for everything- Her long messages on how to come out of any issue, her funny recorded skype videos where she pretends to be the 2 year old brat she was once and her virtual kisses and hugs that is comforting more than any reality in this world.  

“You will always be my overgrown, childish big sister Nim”.

“ Pumpkin, you have no idea what you mean to me- my ever fluttering butterfly.”

                                                              

Is Selfie-Craze really a pursuit of Narcissism

Selfiesss!!!!...  A couple of years back it was defined  as  self-portraits; but now it’s synonymous to madness, addiction, self obsession etc etc etc.... ok let me confess, half n hour before  making this post go live, I clicked 3 Selfies in order to admire the shade of my new lip-gloss. I continued clicking pictures till I underway, hated the shade and cursed myself for purchasing the horrid lip-gloss that made me look less classy in the selfies. No, I am not an addict but hey, clicking selfies and later looking at them gives me an external perspective to my facial features and the cosmetic additions made to them; that is my idea. And at times when the image turns out to be surprisingly nice, I upload it on social media to enjoy adulations and praises from the masses. That’s me, not an addict but an enjoyer of self-potraits.

The other day in the train I was noticing a girl sitting next to me, who was clicking pictures of herself with the front camera, totally oblivious to the outer world. On perceiving further I noticed that she was focusing on her pimple (under her nose towards the left) in each of her photograph very creatively. I know this cause, she was zooming in and out of the picture and her main emphasis was on her pimple. I was rapt with this activity of hers. No sooner, she believed to have found the perfect pimple-picture, she instagrammed it and gave a caption which read- “Ohh the damning evil pimple- making me look so dreadful”. This made me wonder, was she clicking a perfect ugly picture of her self; because she didn’t look ugly in any of the pictures.  I have noticed this pretty girl clicking selfies on almost all the days we have travelled together. No, she doesn’t know of me; I have just been a silent admirer of her pictures in a very much less creepy way. The world would obviously call her an addict, a crazy addict; but I won’t as for me, she is a person who respects her face and her pimples and makes the world believe that she looks beautiful even with a pinkish spot on her face!!

Now let’s talk about celebrity Selfie queens who post pictures when they are apparently about to

sleep or have woken up from their siestas. It’s funny how they manage to look drop dead gorgeous even with a “just woken up” look. You should see me when I wake up in the mornings with a face that will make you start believing in demons and banshees….a face that could cure your constipation for ever. As a kid I have always dreamt of waking up gracefully in the morning with slight sleepy eyes and with a messy yet an elegant hairstyle; but that area is only reserved for the little lady butterflies of the film industry. I am sure even when they haven’t pooped for a long time and are constipated, their selfies will make them look like a dream…..so much for being a celebrity I tell you.

I have a friend from work who I won’t name, and she is addicted to clicking selfies but will never post it anywhere. She clicks it for her pleasure and she keeps looking at them at random intervals. I saw her staring at her selfie for as long as 7 minutes continuously. I waited hoping she might look away at some point; but she didn’t and kept staring. As I was madly in need to go to the loo, I had to leave my investigation mid-day.

Now, being a selfie lover myself, I hate the brand “Selfie addicts” given to anyone. Let’s call it an art of loving oneself by admiring the photogeneity in oneself. As long as it doesn’t distrupt the daily functionality of a human being, what is wrong with clicking selfies that tell u a story about you…. Looking at the pictures, you can imagine what, when and how you were feeling at a certain point of time… tells you what expressions make you look like a princess and what make you look like a moron. I have experienced this. Thanks to my selfies, I know what expressions make me look like a retard. There are times when I look at selfies and introspect about my personality by pondering on my activities of the day. For eg: if I have fought with someone on the day I clicked a selfie, I keep looking at the selfie and realize how the altercation-impact has evidently reflected on my face and makes me solicitous about the matter. At times I continue to be a donkey but there are times when I try to accept my mistake with a willingness to change. Yea, all because of a selfie!!!!

 I don’t support the art of clicking selfies with animals, who you otherwise hate, and uploading them on social media in order to make one look like an animal lover with a caption- “me and my poochie pumpalacious. I resent that; but it’s indeed  silly to call a lady who has uploaded her selfie on social media for the world to see. She is sharing a moment of her life…let’s be happy and considerate about that. After all, we all agree that a woman belongs to the prettiest gender on earth; and admiring her beauty is admiring god’s creativity. So, all I am going to tell the Selfie Lovers on this planet is to continue doing what you love, because there is a certain percent of populace on earth, who loves to see the magical you.

Now before I end my blog, I would like to share some selfies of mine with my favourite selfie partners….

1)      The person who tops the list, is Ms Natasha Vinod, my little sister who is 10 times more mature and 20 times intelligent than me. I call her Pumpkin Pasty. This pic was clicked days before she left India to pursue her higher studies in The United States of America. She is my pillar of strength that has always been there for me with her pretty face, ever ready to solve my problems. Her elegant face is the reason in the picture that makes my face look appealing too. J

2)      The second is my Grand-dad, who is an Ex- Military guy with a mustache that defines strength, might and courage. Well, he is definitely all that but more than that, he is the sweetest person on earth. He loves posing for pictures but hates smiling in them. My little old cute-heart.

   3)      The third is Ms Bhat (Siddhika Bhat), I love her for many reasons…the easiest reason being, we had been roomies for 2 years during our MBA course. She is a chirpy little muffin who has been a part of my soul during the whole tenure. At times when we felt we had nothing better to do, we would go on clicking random retarded selfies in order to make our day.

      

       

      Image  Credits: Google

The Brand value of Item Dancers in Hindi Cinema

 I sipped my morning cup of coffee, ruminating and pondering over the past week. I gradually gathered  the week to be bleakly stodgy for women; television actress Gauhar Khan got slapped by a random idiot who claimed to be some moral police, two  sisters from Haryana beat up 3 youth in a moving bus for allegedly molesting them in public- this case is however under sub judice, as higher Law authorities suspect that the allegations are fake, and a Hindu Mahasabha leader went to the extent of branding item dancers in movies as prostitutes and also sought a prohibition on wearing jeans and skirts by girls in schools .

As a country, we are constantly striving for development and growth. Surely, after a certain point we will accomplish the target set for us economically; but somewhere I do believe we need some change in our outlooks as a major step towards development, not just among men but also among women. In Kerala, till date we have a population of 2 lakh people in the Wayanad region (which consists of a huge mass of tribals). The women are dressed in a way that could sound and look very peculiar to our moral police in the otherwise modernized India. They do not wear any blouse with their sarees and most of the time their upper body is exposed to the outer world. Now, these tribals are not making any style statements as they are not aware about Jennifer Lopez , Charlize Theron or the Kardashian Sisters and also do not have the foggiest idea about Munni, Shiela or JalebiBai, but are women who struggle everyday and every night to make a living for their family. Who judges them? Nobody does, why; because that is their way of living and it’s best not to interfere right? My point is, why do we poke our butts in other cases? If women are dressed in attractive costumes in dance numbers, why can’t a normal human being with minimum common sense understand that she is out there to titivate the movie with her talents and is not attempting to invite men towards her? And why are these dance numbers in movies considered so sordid?  Imagine a bleak movie with no songs or dance numbers which is just a story with regular men and women reciting their dialogues and ending it with a moral. Will such movies work? Oh sure, Art Films and thematic documentaries work but hey, we are talking about Entertainment business where beauty and grace of a woman is utilized to make a project work because at times it serves the purpose of marketing the premise and subject of the movie to the mass audience. We have women in the entertainment Industry   who come from respectable family background of Doctors, armed forces, engineers, commissioned officers and politicians who are affirmatively inclined towards art and creativity. We know of people in the industry who have quit their respective professions to join the Industry not only for the money but mainly for their love of art and creativity. How could/can anyone affront their character or choice this way? Why can’t anyone appreciate the beauty and talent and not salivate on their curves?

Most of us who believe in God also know that the Gods and Goddesses often entertained themselves with dance which was originally invented by them. Pre-historically dance was enjoyed and appreciated by the Gods as a means of celebration and amusement.  Feminine grace and movements were treated in a sacred and pure way. Classical performances like Bharatanatyam, Kathak, Kathakali and other dance forms are today performed as worships for the Lords and yet many of these forms illuminate the beauty and grace in a woman.

I think the world will be a better place for women to live if people in general understood the difference between art and seduction. We have paintings that depict women in a certain way; are they promoting vulgarity? No sir, they are putting forth a point, about a definite essence, feeling or suffering of  a woman. Now if all art enthusiasts start getting aroused by the mere depiction of women in a certain way, then we could have a huge concern in Art, as women were/are mainly used as a muse and interestingly since time immemorial, the muses chosen by artists were prostitutes, maids and dancers. Famous poetries talk about love and affection which mainly focus on women and their beauty. Vintage and modern literatures have spoken about love, lust and arousal where both men and women are largely involved. So are we going to put a stop to all this?

I condemn every man and woman who believe that banning dance numbers will make any difference to molestation or rape. Well, it will make a difference, a huge difference but, to the artistic world as it can cause a huge hindrance in the thought process of creativity with the absence of the most beautiful and charming gender  who we call, women!

Image Credits: Google

Honour Killing- A disease without an antidote

We belong to a country where people canopy themselves under the classification of caste, creed, region, culture, religion, income, occupation, ghotra, gender and what not. Where in one hand, India is proud of its rich and varied culture, on the other hand, we have seen communal violence and brawls over religion and caste. I have always believed that it’s this richness and variedness in India’s heritage that is causing people to operate on the differences in all the aforementioned classifications. Now if a girl expresses her desire to marry a boy from a different caste, she is cursed and ridiculed at, not only by her family but also from friends and relatives who wouldn’t even care at any point of time if she is dead or alive.  Let’s take the latest example of “Honour Killing”, the girl belonged to a renowned Yadav Family of Rajasthan and she fell in love with a boy from a Punjabi Origin. They got married against the girl’s family’s wishes and days later her family made her suffer for her “So-called-wrong decision”.

After a child is born and reaches the growing juncture she is instilled, the emotion and spirit of love and compassion. She is taught about the pain caused to plants by plucking leaves or flowers, the agony caused to animals by pelting stones on them, the thought of respecting elders and loving every fellow human being on earth. Love, you teach her all about love and when she grows up to understand love on her own and try to apply her parent’s wisdoms into practicality, she is termed wrong by the society. Why? Because she found love on her own in a different caste, or a different region? If that is so wrong, then she should have been taught to hate every animal, every tree, and every flower on this planet because they don’t even fall into the category of human beings.

When your child is ready for school, you hope that she reaches a stage where she is capable of taking decisions on her own and become independent, and she chooses a man whom she believes is right for her but, she is derided for that choice. Had she chosen a pair of shoes or a dress or a showpiece, she would have been complimented on her independent decision. What is the point of education, sermons and values if she is not allowed to practice the same in reality? What is the point of helping her gain independence if she is not allowed to act independently on her own life?

What does your religion and culture teach you? To train your kids like animals? So that she leads a life of your choice. So when does she get to live her own life?

As a married man or woman, do you or don’t you get attracted to the opposite gender? While some rheostat their inner urges I have heard of men and women acting onto it. They rape, they tease, they indulge and do worse.  When you don’t check the caste and creed of the opposite sex for such ghastly and sickening activities, why do you care so much about the man your daughter has chosen for a holy union, a relationship so sacred? Are you concerned that you will lose your name and reputation in your society? Since when has society become so important than your own daughter? Tomorrow, when you are on your sickbed, who is going to bring you a glass of water, ensure you take your medicines on time or cover you with a blanket when you feel sick? Who is going to give you a hug of comfort and a kiss of reassurance on your cheek? Is it the society or your daughter.  A daughter, whom you brought up with love and care, nourished and educated her till the age of 21… and then you, crushed that flower of yours by strangling her to death.  You told her once, you told her twice but she didn’t listen. Maybe she was hoping deep down her heart that come whatever may, her parents are going to understand her. She never believed in her society, but she trusted her parents. 

She somewhere believed that after sometime her parents will hug her, forget her mistake and accept her decision, the same parents who were actually conspiring murder plans to abolish her from their lives, because their society meant more to them than their own blood!

(Image Credits: Google)

Soaring…flying….bah humbug!!

For my exquisite ladies who believe that being tall is a blessing from the almighty, let me give you a reality check. Sure- traditional clothes look grand on tall girls and putting on weight looks less hideous; but apart from all this, we face serious susceptibilities emotionally, socially and medically. It’s not a cake walk guys….

Image Credits: Google

I faced my first veracity when I was in 3^rd Grade and I saw my maid’s son wearing my favourite "Tom & Jerry" T-shirt. I tried talking to my mother about it, how could she give it away like that?

“Are you cracked Nimmy, that T-shirt looks more like a blouse (worn with saree), exposing your belly buttons and I won’t have you roaming about in that attire till I am living with you”.

“Fine, why don’t you visit your parents in Kerala for some-time”.

“Ha-ha nice try”.

Me playing the bride-groom at a school play

During school days, I was made to sit on the last bench, it sucked! And during our convent school plays, I was always, always...the boy. Yea, there was one time when I played a female role- that was when I played the wicked and evil witch. Otherwise, I never qualified as a woman in any school play. I remember my pretty sister playing a princess, an empress, or a fairy; while I get to be a pastor, a gremlin, a train or a tree. So people around, convinced me that life will be so much better as a grown up.

So, I grew up to be 5’7 inches tall. Ok, I know that’s not very tall but it’s quite tall for an Asian. And life is no better even now. I went for shopping yesterday as I had to purchase a ceremonial shirt. I tried umpteen numbers of shirts but my Mum was not even a least bit satisfied. She said aloud incensed, “Isn’t there anything here that can cover your Bum?”

The shop-guy looked palpably confused and asked, “Ma’am, are you looking for a shirt or an overcoat?”

I can’t even begin to explain how embarrassed I was.

A Maxi-gown looks like a joke on me when I try it on as it barely reaches my ankle. I look like a nomad from the pre-historic era. It is very difficult to get a gown that gracefully reaches till my feet.       

Image Credits: Google

If I have to talk about travelling, the bus rides to any place is an excruciating ordeal especially when the seats are too cramped up. My knees keep getting jounced to the seat ahead and they look like Meat Dumplings when I get down. Not just my knees but my back is taken for a ride too. Ahh that’s the punishment my chicas,  for being obnoxiously tall.

Do you think that’s it? Bwaahahaha there is more…

I get judged at by wearing heels, people look at me like I am wearing somebody’s chest hair on my feet. No seriously, do you think tall girls don’t like wearing heels? We love heels too, it’s not only a mechanism to make you a few inches taller but it gives a certain form of grace and elegance to your walk. Even my Dad has agreed that I walk more lady-like with heels on.

Now I totally like clicking pictures and I am in love with all pictures which has “ME”. But, most of my pictures look funny with my face hovering over my gals like a ghostly orb;  and if it’s one of my little angels clicking my picture, they ruin the masterpiece by cutting me my head off the picture. This is one thing that totally annoys me. If you are not capable to take a complete picture with all my essential human organs then why would you even insist on clicking a picture? But hey, I love you guys.

Image Credits: Google

My mother keeps talking about the issues a tall girl faces while looking out for suitors because many a times we will have to reject proposals only on the basis of height.

Image Credits: Google

Seriously girls, if you have an average height or if you are a little short, don’t blame your parents, god or  destiny, because there is so much you can do and be that tall girls can’t even dream of.  Sure basketball needs huge and strong women but a ballerina looks beautiful when she is petite and poised.  This world offers something for everyone. Realize it, understand it and love yourself and your body more than anything else in this world.

PS: While I conclude this blog, I am trying to fit into the couch at my friend’s place which is barely 5 Feet long. While my not-so-beautiful feet point towards heaven over a pile of pillows and cushions arranged for me, I am hoping for God to kick in some love and positive energy through my toes into my psyche. Amen!