My fluttering Butterfly….

 A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life. ~ Unknown

If you have a sibling, you are a lucky dude but if you have a sister then you are luckier, however if you have a little sister- life is a giant feast. A feast with a lot of desserts where unfortunately, we have got to face a little bitter dish here and there; as no cook in this world is perfect. When you eat your perfect dish sometimes u come across tangy stuff, pungent ingredients; you might put aside what you don’t like but you will never abandon your dish because it had an awesome start. That is exactly how it is when you have a little sister in your life. She is sweet, she is spicy she is bitter…but she is yours till the very end.

When I was 2 years of age, I received a gift in a form of a small rotund doll with a lot of hair on her head like a little brown crown....but hey, “she moves!!!” I thought. “She blinks her eyes just like me and she is so fair…her cheeks are as flushed as raspberries…is she mine?? Please tell me I can keep her forever.” said the 2 year old me to mom and dad. They smiled and told me she is mine and that I have to be a protective elder sister and take care of her always. How lovely of them, I thought then…. how smart of them, I think now.

True to my words, I have always been around her, took care of her, played with her and groomed her. She was actively involved in making my life pleasant, participated in all my crimes, and played a lawyer in my defence; but sometimes she was also a reason why I wished I was a single child; as she was very smart in using my tactics against me- the leader who taught her the act.

When we were young, she was as petite as snow and as delicate as a bubble. She wanted her elder sister around when the big boys bullied her, when dad and mom cornered her and when her friends irritated her. Me in akimbo was enough to scare any goon or anything evil from her, that is what she believes unequivocally even now.

As we grew older, life taught me that I need her more than she ever needed me in life. We are from the same set of parents, with the same blood running in our veins with the same upbringing and cultural values instilled. But like they say- no two snowflakes are alike. I learnt that both of us are completely different in absolute different ways and that she always stood by me to support me in all my misery. When I was in 5^th Grade, I was once weeping on the school stairs over an incident, where my friends teased me for my hairstyle. I got upset and ran to the staircase near the school library- Library because, that’s one place nobody visits. Anyway, my sister found out and she came running to me to share a piece of chocolate her friend gave her and saw me crying. She stormed into my classroom and yelled at my friend saying, “well atleast my sister does not have the most stupid pigtails you are sporting. You look like a monkey with those pigtails” and dashed out of the class. She came to me and she said, “If someone has to insult you, it can only be me. I wont allow anybody else to say anything to you”, and she went back to her class leaving me marveling at my 8 year old sister.

You can’t get her eat any chocolate or a piece of cake without her sharing it with me. That’s a must for her. Every chocolate, every piece of cake and every pizza or samosa has a share for me always; even now. On all her birthday parties, she would tell the closest relatives to also get a gift for me. In order to appease her, granddad still wishes us both on both our birthdays. Now even as grownups nothing has changed . All I know is, her love and consideration has only grown for me. She is my little sister but is far mature and intelligent than I am. I am the one who gets cranky and jealous when she is given more importance and then she takes charge and handles my immaturity with epic sweetness. She ensures I am given enough importance as she hates it when I make a big noise about it.

When you look at her, you will notice that she is pretty, she is classy and she is soft; and when you look at me you will see that I am an overgrown baby who is loud and abrupt. She hates is when I don’t maintain a decorum when I am at  public places. She will give me a disapproving look when I would fight with cabbies for fares or when I would yell at a shop keeper in high decibels. Like I mentioned before, personality wise, we are as different as sky and water but as sisters we are as compatible as milk and sugar.

She is my everything in life and has proved to be my coloured butterfly during depression, my angel for discretion and my doll throughout life. No problem remains a problem with her in the vicinity and no damage remains damage, with her chocolaty effect on them. Sharing problems with her gives me a great sense of relief and a feeling as if it’s already resolved. Her smile works as a remedy during misery and medicine during pain. Now she is in the US, pursuing her dream and yea the distance sure matter; but my sister knows exactly how to cover up for everything- Her long messages on how to come out of any issue, her funny recorded skype videos where she pretends to be the 2 year old brat she was once and her virtual kisses and hugs that is comforting more than any reality in this world.  

“You will always be my overgrown, childish big sister Nim”.

“ Pumpkin, you have no idea what you mean to me- my ever fluttering butterfly.”

                                                              

Is Selfie-Craze really a pursuit of Narcissism

Selfiesss!!!!...  A couple of years back it was defined  as  self-portraits; but now it’s synonymous to madness, addiction, self obsession etc etc etc.... ok let me confess, half n hour before  making this post go live, I clicked 3 Selfies in order to admire the shade of my new lip-gloss. I continued clicking pictures till I underway, hated the shade and cursed myself for purchasing the horrid lip-gloss that made me look less classy in the selfies. No, I am not an addict but hey, clicking selfies and later looking at them gives me an external perspective to my facial features and the cosmetic additions made to them; that is my idea. And at times when the image turns out to be surprisingly nice, I upload it on social media to enjoy adulations and praises from the masses. That’s me, not an addict but an enjoyer of self-potraits.

The other day in the train I was noticing a girl sitting next to me, who was clicking pictures of herself with the front camera, totally oblivious to the outer world. On perceiving further I noticed that she was focusing on her pimple (under her nose towards the left) in each of her photograph very creatively. I know this cause, she was zooming in and out of the picture and her main emphasis was on her pimple. I was rapt with this activity of hers. No sooner, she believed to have found the perfect pimple-picture, she instagrammed it and gave a caption which read- “Ohh the damning evil pimple- making me look so dreadful”. This made me wonder, was she clicking a perfect ugly picture of her self; because she didn’t look ugly in any of the pictures.  I have noticed this pretty girl clicking selfies on almost all the days we have travelled together. No, she doesn’t know of me; I have just been a silent admirer of her pictures in a very much less creepy way. The world would obviously call her an addict, a crazy addict; but I won’t as for me, she is a person who respects her face and her pimples and makes the world believe that she looks beautiful even with a pinkish spot on her face!!

Now let’s talk about celebrity Selfie queens who post pictures when they are apparently about to

sleep or have woken up from their siestas. It’s funny how they manage to look drop dead gorgeous even with a “just woken up” look. You should see me when I wake up in the mornings with a face that will make you start believing in demons and banshees….a face that could cure your constipation for ever. As a kid I have always dreamt of waking up gracefully in the morning with slight sleepy eyes and with a messy yet an elegant hairstyle; but that area is only reserved for the little lady butterflies of the film industry. I am sure even when they haven’t pooped for a long time and are constipated, their selfies will make them look like a dream…..so much for being a celebrity I tell you.

I have a friend from work who I won’t name, and she is addicted to clicking selfies but will never post it anywhere. She clicks it for her pleasure and she keeps looking at them at random intervals. I saw her staring at her selfie for as long as 7 minutes continuously. I waited hoping she might look away at some point; but she didn’t and kept staring. As I was madly in need to go to the loo, I had to leave my investigation mid-day.

Now, being a selfie lover myself, I hate the brand “Selfie addicts” given to anyone. Let’s call it an art of loving oneself by admiring the photogeneity in oneself. As long as it doesn’t distrupt the daily functionality of a human being, what is wrong with clicking selfies that tell u a story about you…. Looking at the pictures, you can imagine what, when and how you were feeling at a certain point of time… tells you what expressions make you look like a princess and what make you look like a moron. I have experienced this. Thanks to my selfies, I know what expressions make me look like a retard. There are times when I look at selfies and introspect about my personality by pondering on my activities of the day. For eg: if I have fought with someone on the day I clicked a selfie, I keep looking at the selfie and realize how the altercation-impact has evidently reflected on my face and makes me solicitous about the matter. At times I continue to be a donkey but there are times when I try to accept my mistake with a willingness to change. Yea, all because of a selfie!!!!

 I don’t support the art of clicking selfies with animals, who you otherwise hate, and uploading them on social media in order to make one look like an animal lover with a caption- “me and my poochie pumpalacious. I resent that; but it’s indeed  silly to call a lady who has uploaded her selfie on social media for the world to see. She is sharing a moment of her life…let’s be happy and considerate about that. After all, we all agree that a woman belongs to the prettiest gender on earth; and admiring her beauty is admiring god’s creativity. So, all I am going to tell the Selfie Lovers on this planet is to continue doing what you love, because there is a certain percent of populace on earth, who loves to see the magical you.

Now before I end my blog, I would like to share some selfies of mine with my favourite selfie partners….

1)      The person who tops the list, is Ms Natasha Vinod, my little sister who is 10 times more mature and 20 times intelligent than me. I call her Pumpkin Pasty. This pic was clicked days before she left India to pursue her higher studies in The United States of America. She is my pillar of strength that has always been there for me with her pretty face, ever ready to solve my problems. Her elegant face is the reason in the picture that makes my face look appealing too. J

2)      The second is my Grand-dad, who is an Ex- Military guy with a mustache that defines strength, might and courage. Well, he is definitely all that but more than that, he is the sweetest person on earth. He loves posing for pictures but hates smiling in them. My little old cute-heart.

   3)      The third is Ms Bhat (Siddhika Bhat), I love her for many reasons…the easiest reason being, we had been roomies for 2 years during our MBA course. She is a chirpy little muffin who has been a part of my soul during the whole tenure. At times when we felt we had nothing better to do, we would go on clicking random retarded selfies in order to make our day.

      

       

      Image  Credits: Google

The Brand value of Item Dancers in Hindi Cinema

 I sipped my morning cup of coffee, ruminating and pondering over the past week. I gradually gathered  the week to be bleakly stodgy for women; television actress Gauhar Khan got slapped by a random idiot who claimed to be some moral police, two  sisters from Haryana beat up 3 youth in a moving bus for allegedly molesting them in public- this case is however under sub judice, as higher Law authorities suspect that the allegations are fake, and a Hindu Mahasabha leader went to the extent of branding item dancers in movies as prostitutes and also sought a prohibition on wearing jeans and skirts by girls in schools .

As a country, we are constantly striving for development and growth. Surely, after a certain point we will accomplish the target set for us economically; but somewhere I do believe we need some change in our outlooks as a major step towards development, not just among men but also among women. In Kerala, till date we have a population of 2 lakh people in the Wayanad region (which consists of a huge mass of tribals). The women are dressed in a way that could sound and look very peculiar to our moral police in the otherwise modernized India. They do not wear any blouse with their sarees and most of the time their upper body is exposed to the outer world. Now, these tribals are not making any style statements as they are not aware about Jennifer Lopez , Charlize Theron or the Kardashian Sisters and also do not have the foggiest idea about Munni, Shiela or JalebiBai, but are women who struggle everyday and every night to make a living for their family. Who judges them? Nobody does, why; because that is their way of living and it’s best not to interfere right? My point is, why do we poke our butts in other cases? If women are dressed in attractive costumes in dance numbers, why can’t a normal human being with minimum common sense understand that she is out there to titivate the movie with her talents and is not attempting to invite men towards her? And why are these dance numbers in movies considered so sordid?  Imagine a bleak movie with no songs or dance numbers which is just a story with regular men and women reciting their dialogues and ending it with a moral. Will such movies work? Oh sure, Art Films and thematic documentaries work but hey, we are talking about Entertainment business where beauty and grace of a woman is utilized to make a project work because at times it serves the purpose of marketing the premise and subject of the movie to the mass audience. We have women in the entertainment Industry   who come from respectable family background of Doctors, armed forces, engineers, commissioned officers and politicians who are affirmatively inclined towards art and creativity. We know of people in the industry who have quit their respective professions to join the Industry not only for the money but mainly for their love of art and creativity. How could/can anyone affront their character or choice this way? Why can’t anyone appreciate the beauty and talent and not salivate on their curves?

Most of us who believe in God also know that the Gods and Goddesses often entertained themselves with dance which was originally invented by them. Pre-historically dance was enjoyed and appreciated by the Gods as a means of celebration and amusement.  Feminine grace and movements were treated in a sacred and pure way. Classical performances like Bharatanatyam, Kathak, Kathakali and other dance forms are today performed as worships for the Lords and yet many of these forms illuminate the beauty and grace in a woman.

I think the world will be a better place for women to live if people in general understood the difference between art and seduction. We have paintings that depict women in a certain way; are they promoting vulgarity? No sir, they are putting forth a point, about a definite essence, feeling or suffering of  a woman. Now if all art enthusiasts start getting aroused by the mere depiction of women in a certain way, then we could have a huge concern in Art, as women were/are mainly used as a muse and interestingly since time immemorial, the muses chosen by artists were prostitutes, maids and dancers. Famous poetries talk about love and affection which mainly focus on women and their beauty. Vintage and modern literatures have spoken about love, lust and arousal where both men and women are largely involved. So are we going to put a stop to all this?

I condemn every man and woman who believe that banning dance numbers will make any difference to molestation or rape. Well, it will make a difference, a huge difference but, to the artistic world as it can cause a huge hindrance in the thought process of creativity with the absence of the most beautiful and charming gender  who we call, women!

Image Credits: Google